elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
When I was in fifth grade I realized I liked girls but I was like “that’s a problem for another day” and literally forgot about it and then in like eleventh grade I was like “oh my god”
YOU PROCRASTINATED REALIZING YOUR SEXUALITY THAT’S IT YOU WIN YOU ARE THE QUEEN OF THE PROCRASTINATORS i bow to you
(Source: iseeavoice, via ohthedappernessofme)
2073:
money can’t buy happiness but it can buy a false sense of security and fruity alcoholic beverages to numb the pain and honestly what’s the difference
(via disneyprincest)
how are good lookin dudes always friends with other good lookin dudes is there some sort of secret hot boy gang or something
(via inbox)
i jUST WALKED INTO MY MOMS ROOM AND THERE’S A DACHSHUND IN HERE
WE DON’T OWN A DACHSHUND????
????????
okay this dog is so sweet but where is my mom omfg
Your mom has been turned into a dachshund. It’s you’re responsibility to lift the curse.
Your adventure is beginning, my friend.
(via iphoneicarly)
The time Lea Michele tried to serenade Jay Z and Beyoncé wasn’t having it.
A horcrux is an object in which a person has concealed a part of their soul. one splits one’s soul and hides part of it in an object. By doing so, you’re protected, should you be attacked and your body destroyed. That part of your soul that is hidden lives on. In other words, you cannot die.
(Source: johannamasons, via ohthedappernessofme)
“mickey mouse it says you want to divorce minnie because she was…… extremely silly?”
“no, i said she was fucking goofy”
please stop reblogging this i stole this joke from my brother
(via inbox)
if i were famous, i’d go to a red carpet event in a fashionable tan leather dress, and when they asked me who i was wearing, i’d say ‘i don’t know her name, but she had a beautiful complexion, didn’t she?’
(via disneyprincest)
do animals think in english or in the sounds they make
this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for
(via beyoncebeytwice)
